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What to Expect
Free Meet & Greet
Understandably, you may be nervous and unsure of what to expect in talking therapy if you have not experienced it before. Therefore, I offer a free 10 minute meet and greet online Zoom session to all clients. This will determine if we are a good fit and if what I have to offer is the right approach for you.
People often feel scared to engage with relationship therapy because they don't want to feel like they will be 'ganged up on', made to 'feel wrong', or 'expected to change'. If these are your concerns please be reassured this will not be the case. Your needs and wants, fears and desires are as valid as your partners. The purpose of the sessions is to provide you with a way to have these communicated, heard and meet in a safe and fulfilling way.
Session Length - Individual Sex Therapy
Once you have decided to proceed with sessions we will book an appointment. An appointment for individual sex therapy is 50 minutes. First appointments include initial interviews and/or questionaires for assessment and goal setting. In further appointments we will therapeutically work on the topics that you wish to raise, and learn strategies to address the arising issues. The number of therapy sessions will be determined by your specific needs and goals. In the course of the therapy we will establish points at which to evaluate your satisfaction and progress. I encourage you to raise any questions or concerns that you have about therapy at any time.
Brief intervention for coaching or education is also available where you may get what you need from one 20-30 minute session or, you may choose to return for further shorter sessions to learn further strategies, and/or for further processing and answering of specific questions.
I will see individuals for sex therapy. If in the initial session the sexological issue is assessed to be affecting the relationship, unless counter indicated, I will discuss seeing you as a couple in further sessions. This is in service of the best outcomes for you.
Session Length - Relationship Therapy
Relationship therapy initial assessment most likely will be completed over three sessions depending on what approach is being utilised. First we will all meet together 65 minutes to complete intake interviews. Second session time will be split between individual sessions of either 30 minutes or 50 minutes each. You may be required to complete online assessment questionaires between sessions. Third session will be 65 minutes to meet and discuss assessment outcome, treatment planning and intervention. The first two sessions of the assessment process may be offered in a block if this suits your needs better, which will accelerate your access to intervention. You will be asked to complete the online assessment questionaires while your partner is in their individual session. Consensual non-monogamy relationship therapy sessions will be determined on a case-by- case basis depending on the relational configurations.
You will be provided with additional information at your first session of rights and responsibility, therapy contracts, and consent forms. Duration of the therapy will be collaboratively determined by your specific needs and goals.
If you have attended individual sex therapy with me for more than one to two sessions I will recommend you be referred to someone else for couples/relationship therapy. This is best practise and in service of supporting your relationship(s).
If you have any queries about how to begin your therapeutic journey please utilise the 10 minute free meet and greet consultation appointment.
Crisis
Individual and relationship therapy sessions will be provided during normal business hours i.e 8.30-5pm. Outside of these hours public counselling crisis services need to be accessed for support ie Lifeline 0800 543 354 or text 4357, or Need to Talk ph/text 1737, or your local mental health crisis team.
Session Location
Sessions will be held online via Zoom. I am based in Taranaki, Aotearoa/New Zealand and if you prefer local face to face appointments this can be discussed. For online sessions you will need a computer, solid internet connection, microphone, headphones, video and quiet and private space at your end. You can utilise the 10 minute meet and greet session to test your connection and set up.
Responsibilities
Confidentiality
Your information is kept private and confidential. If you meet me in the community you are welcome to ignore or acknowledge me to maintain your anonymity at your choosing. Brief clinical notes may be kept to support the direction of the therapy/coaching session. These will be kept in locked premises and destroyed appropriately. Your consent will be sought if information needs to be shared between health care professionals i.e, to GP, Psychologist, Psychiatrist. Please note if you threaten to harm yourself, you threaten to harm another, or a minor, this information needs to be shared with the appropriate professionals, for your's or someone else’s safety. You will still be informed of what the process will entail and what information will be shared.
The client contract is available for you to read and consent to prior to commencing therapy.
Assessment
Sessions may include taking a comprehensive sexual history, and/or formal questionnaires related to your specific concern. These may cover topic areas such as medical, chemistry, communication and companionship. These may feel like a lot of questions but they are tailored to your pace and, are important to ensuring your concern is adequately and appropriately addressed. Your engagement with answering questions is voluntary yet highly encouraged for enabling the best outcome.
Communication
My approach to all written communication in relationship therapy is to include/cc all partners. Please ensure you follow this process, i.e 'reply all' in all emails, in service of the best outcomes for you. Transparency is important to minimise miscommunication and concerns of bias.
Liaison
My approach is therapeutic and not pathologising as I do not diagnose. If I believe the needs are more complex than I can address, I will not hesitate to state this in our initial assessment. I will refer on and/or liaise with your consent, with other professionals involved in your care. This may include referrals to GP’s, Psychologists, Psychiatrist's etc if medical review or diagnosis is required.
Secrets
Please note in relationship therapy secrets in your relationship (i.e affairs) will not be held by the Therapist. You will be expected to take responsibility for it. If you have not disclosed information to your partner(s) such as an affair this will be discussed in your individual session and time given for this conversation to be approached between you, before the commencement of relationship therapy intervention. The Therapist will not be revealing your secret. Ultimately if you choose not to disclose it to your partner(s), we may continue individual sessions but relationship therapy will end as the relationship integrity cannot be upheld if all parties are not priviledged to this information. Additionally, if you are in an active affair, relationship therapy will not continue as it is not constructive to the repair of the relationship.
Engagement for success
Educational resources and recommendations will be provided throughout the sessions if appropriate. As with any self-development; doing, integrating, and practise, are the keys to progressing towards successfully reaching your goals. This is reliant on all parties actively engaging with the process.